Postpartum, How to Care for Down There

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In the weeks leading up to our induction day, I kept asking my husband if he was ready - was he ready to be a father, to be responsible for taking care of another human being, could he believe we were having a baby. He would always end up asking me the same question, was I ready. Each time, my reply would be about the same - ask me once she's here. I wasn't concerned with her arrival, taking care of her and helping her grow into an amazing tiny human, but I was scared out of my mind about labor and delivery. Logically, when we found out we were finally pregnant I knew in nine short months she would need to exit my body and enter the world. Illogically, my infertility traumatized brain just kept trying to convince me that that day would never come.

Well, it did come. Induction day came and roughly 36 hours later we were the proud (and terrified) new parents of an adorable baby girl. After spending what felt like an eternity stuck in the hospital (5 days), we, finally, were discharged and able to go home. There's a few things that I think are important to note here - although my labor was long because of the induction process I was incredibly lucky. I didn't have to have a c-section, although at one point that was mentioned as a potential next step if my body didn't dilate, and I didn't have any tearing on the outside. The deep tearing I suffered in my hoo-ha, I was told by my doctor, was the result of my beautiful little girl flinging her fist of fury on her travels to the outside world. As far as tears go, though, this wasn't very painful. The doctor also made a point to tell me that stitches in the vagina typically heal pretty quickly.

On the first night after she was born, as the epidural wore off, I was given alternating doses of ibuprofen and Tylenol as needed and, for the most part, felt fine (read: adrenaline was still pumping). My first trip to the bathroom after giving birth was an experience all of its own. The nurse, who hooked me up after delivery with a peanut butter covered English muffin (the most delicious meal I've ever eaten), some mom juice (a cocktail of orange juice, apple juice, cranberry juice, and ginger ale), and helped teach me how to get Eila to latch during our first breast feeding sessions, wheeled me into the bathroom and walked me through the less than exciting new process of how to deal with my lady bits after having a watermelon sized human exit it. The peri bottle soon became my new BFF as I layered my hospital briefs with the worlds thickest pad (I honestly didn't know pads were made that thick), witch hazel cooling pads, and an ice pack. The whole thing felt awkward and a little gross, but I knew that this part wouldn't last long.

At home, I had prepared not one but two mommy stations - one in each of the two bathrooms on the first floor. I wanted to make sure that I had everything I could need without having to go to one bathroom all the time or search endlessly at 2am. I also wanted to make sure that I, my lady parts, was as comfortable as possible to avoid being extra grumpy or unnecessarily sore. In all honesty, I 100% over purchased items. As a first time mom, I wasn't really sure what to get or how much/many. Because there was no way to predict the extent of tearing and discomfort I would face after delivery, I opted to have too many items on hand than face the situation of not having enough.

My essentials:

Big, unflattering granny panties: For the first few days of being home, I was gifted a pack of lady Depend. Yep, you read that right. I wore those suckers for the first few days with pride I never expected and a level of comfort I didn't even know was possible. Patrick only made one joke that the kiddo and I were both in diapers before realizing that the stink I shot him meant he needed to shush. These light pink, floral patterned undies were incredibly soft, easy to get on, and meant that I didn't need to fuss with adding a giant, thick pad to my underwear. This was especially helpful during the first few nights when the bleeding was a bit heavier and I was slightly more uncomfortable/sore. Once I was less sore and had slightly less swelling, I transitioned to panties from Motherhood Maternity. I'm not sure if it's just me, but I find that these do not run true to size. I purchased several pairs during my pregnancy thinking they would be great and not dig into the bump. While this proved true, I purchased my normal size according to their size chart and they were HUGE on me. This meant that these were not amazing during pregnancy and gave me a serious diaper butt in pants, but these were ideal for postpartum.

Pads: My mom had sent me, in a care package, CORA pads and bladder liners, but I soon realized that I needed something in between the thickest pad in the world from the hospital and the thin CORA pads. I had a flashback during the first night home when I explained to my husband that he would need to go to the store and get me pads. You see, when I got my first period my Mom sent my Dad to CVS to get pads. Armed with only the knowledge that his little girl was now a woman who needed pads, he ventured to the store. In retelling this story, my Mom recounts that she wasn't sure what was taking him so long, but upon his return she soon figured out the issue. My adorable dad had been out of his depth and purchased long pads, short pads, heavy pads, light pads, pads with wings, pads without wings, and the list goes on. Not wanting the same thing to happen twice to another one of my favorite men in the world, I sent Patrick a picture of exactly what package of pads he needed to purchase - the Always Stay Free Ultra-thin Nighttime pads. These pads are slightly thicker than the CORA pads and were perfect for day and night use post-partum. The CORA pads were great after the first few days when I could transition to a thinner liner and only was experiencing spotting. By the start of the third week postpartum, I started using only the bladder pads just in case.

Perineal Products: From the picture above, you can tell that I went overboard with perineal care products. Again, I had no idea what I would or would not need. Let's start with my favorite of the group, TUCKS. If you're expecting, I highly recommend that you buy yourself some TUCKS (you're worth it, your crotch is worth it and will thank you). The same idea as what was supplied in the hospital, TUCKS are cooling, witch hazel pads. Put a few spread out over the length of your pad and you're good to go. Part of the FridaMom kit I was gifted from our registry, both bathrooms were also outfitted with FridaMom perineal cooling pad liners and healing foam. The pad liners are similar to TUCKS, but where TUCKS are small circular pads, the liners are long, rectangular pads. I think it's personal choice between the two, honestly, since they do essentially the same thing and provide the same amount of relief (IMO). Additionally, I had one bottle of the Earth Momma herbal perineal spray. This bottle is specifically made to spray upside down, which makes application fairly easy. This spray has a mix of cucumber, witch hazel, and other herbs giving it a slightly different smell than the other two. It's important to note that all of these products essentially have the same goal / do the same thing although the application methods (pads, foam, spray) differ greatly. All of these products, aim to help with healing and to minimize discomfort post-partum with the ultimate goal to cool, soothe, and relieve pain. 

Peri Bottle: If I didn't already make this clear, the peri bottle will be your bestie during the first few weeks of your postpartum journey. After you've completed your business, using the peri bottle with warm water to cleanse yourself makes a world of difference. Before induction, I made sure to have two of the FridaMom peri bottles on hand. These are specifically designed to be used upside down, which makes the whole process that much easier.

Ice Packs: If I had to identify an item that I didn't need, this would have been it. Again, I was incredibly lucky delivery wise and by the time I got home I really wasn't that uncomfortable. For many, though, the journey to recovery is greatly improved with the addition of an ice pack. Because of this, I would make sure to have some on hand again, but I probably, you know, wouldn't have quite so many. Although many folks opt to make their own hootchie ice packs with cooling properties, I opted to stock up on another FridaMom item, the instant ice maxi-pads. These padsicles, as the packaging refers to them, are on demand ice packs and pads in one. To activate, you fold the ice pack in half until it cracks and then shake them up before applying. When I did use these, they were incredibly helpful. I really didn't expect them to get very cool never-mind cold, but they did!

Ultimately, the best recommendation I can leave you with in preparing for the arrival of your little one is to make sure to also prepare for yourself. In my day job, I find myself often telling 18-22 year olds that they are going to experience a big life change going away to college and that, although a great idea in theory, that it isn't the time to make other big life or lifestyle changes. This is the same situation. Welcoming home a new bundle of joy is amazing, but also a huge adjustment for you, your family, your animals etc. By making sure that you have everything on hand to take care of yourself, be it postpartum care items for your vagina, pre-cooked food, super comfy clothing, a friend or family member you can call for help, whatever, it will enable you to be the best mommy you can be. Let's be honest, life with a newborn is freakin' hard. Try to be kind to yourself by making this part of the journey a little more stress free and painless if for no other reason than your vagina will thank you.